well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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