I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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