Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
