I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
