It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
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