i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
