Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
