She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
