when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I will pee on everything he values.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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