There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
