Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
