is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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