I just pynch a tree in the face
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
