I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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