He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
