Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
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