I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
