i don't like sucking hair
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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