why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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