we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize