im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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