You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
