Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Randomize
