that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
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She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
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