Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize