omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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