The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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