Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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