After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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