I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
