how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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