his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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