Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Yo dont text me then not text me
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
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so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
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I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize