They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Randomize
