Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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