Your tits are I can't wait for
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
there's paper in my vomit.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
