You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
