grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
She told me I should be a condom model.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
