Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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