Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
