Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
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