omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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