Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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