apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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