you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
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