omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
