Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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