Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
