Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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