I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize