ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
